So you find yourself dating a white man or a black woman for the first time, and are wondering what to expect. At least in the United States, statistics show that interracial relationships are still a small but growing minority. As a rule it seems, most people prefer to date someone of the same skin color as theirs. In the past, interracial relationships were even legally frowned upon, but attitudes have changed considerably for the better in the past few decades.
You're All That I Want
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A kind, smart man who moves me, might be able to rock with me, regardless of race or ethnicity. The vast majority of my Black girlfriends exclusively and purposely date Black men, so I get a lot of questions about my UN-friendly dating roster and most of those questions are about the white dudes. Seeing specific movies is not a dating requirement for me. You better know and love Stevie Wonder, though. Then there are two troubling statements that I often hear.
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The killing of George Floyd, a Black man, by a Minneapolis police officer on May 25, has sparked difficult discussions about race, white supremacy, and police brutality in the United States. Given the injustices at hand, you may find yourself having several tough conversations with the people in your life, including your partner and perhaps their family members. Discussing unconscious bias with your partner and their family is a productive way to start unpacking race, white privilege, and the hardships so many BIPOC Black, Indigenous, people of color deal with every day. You might be hesitant to start this conversation because you recognize it will be uncomfortable.
Why do I date white women? Black women have told me it's because I'm a sellout. The white men who can get past the mental anguish of my black penis tarnishing "their" women think I'm making some latent admission that their race has the most attractive women. White women range from those so intrigued by black men that it veers into fetish to those so reluctant to date black men that it feels more racist than preference-driven. These are generalizations, of course, but they are attitudes that I've personally encountered.